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woolymonkey
25 July 2008 @ 02:36 pm
woot!  
Lots of good stuff lately

Spidermonkey went on a school trip to Paris and Normandy.  Came back with lots of new goth accessories obtained by haggling (in English) under the Eiffel Tower.  But used his French to order a pizza at Parc Astérix, so that's OK.

Squirelmonkey passed his Grade 1 cornet exam with Merit.  He scored 20 out of 21 for scales and arpeggios, which has to be borderline robotic, but in a good way.

The busking stall at the school summer fair reached new highs - or possibly lows -  with Spider and several friends returning from Big School to play a mean guitar gig.  They lack a singer, but Squirrelmonkey did a fine job of Green Day's American Idiot with no rehearsal, while Musicmonkey stunned the crowd with his Anarchy in the UK.  It's not ever day you see a middle-aged punk straining to read the lyrics from a printout in front of a crowd of waist high pogo-ers.  The cool guitar players coped splendidly.

We're off to France soon for ten days camping in Brittany - or further south if the weather is cold.

And I have a new (part time) job!  More of which in a friends-locked post.
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woolymonkey
01 July 2008 @ 10:55 am
Spidermonkey Writes About God  
Religion and writing are normally equally alien to Spidermonkey, but his class were told to do this in ten minutes at the end of a Humanities lesson.  His friend, J, did the actual writing, which is why tricky words like 'fleas' are spelled right.


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woolymonkey
25 June 2008 @ 02:38 pm
PC Word - and I don't mean "computer"  
I recently used the word housewife in a translation. (The German was Hausfrau; it seemed the obvious thing to do.) 

I was surprised to find the Word grammar checker underlined it and suggested homemaker instead.  I see where it's coming from, but still - grammar checker?

I started wondering what other terms Word would caution me against?

It seems the following words are dangerous: lady (suggestions: woman, person), chairman (chair, chairperson), and actress (actor).

On the other hand, authoress, seamstress, fireman, and (sorry about this, but I needed to know) nigger - are waved through with a big paperclippy grin.  If I thought there was a mind behind this, I'd be very, very disturbed.

Language = UK English, BTW.
 
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woolymonkey
17 June 2008 @ 08:52 am
cat news  
Fruitcake is home after her thyroid op and doing well. The cats now have their own livejournal account: [info]zil_n_fruitcake .

I blame [info]samandshiva  and [info]tamaranth . They are all Bad Influences.

I'm supposed to be applying for a job today...

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woolymonkey
11 June 2008 @ 05:09 pm
Death ray not fully functional  
Spidermonkey now has his own userpic.  Since I still haven't had time to upload pictures of his artwork for the school production of Hair, here's what he told me about his day yesterday.

"M [spider's dangerously bright friend] built a death ray at break time, but it didn't work." 

Apparently, if you rub the bottom of a Coke can with chocolate (which is - again apparently - a weak alkali) for three hours, you get a concave shiny surface capable of focusing the sun's rays into a deadly beam.

The break-time death ray was scuppered by insufficient chocolate-rubbing time and the sun going behind a cloud, but M allegedly built a working one at home. 
"How did he know it worked?" I asked nervously. 
"He tried it on a leaf."

Has anyone heard of this before?  Is it based on any kind of reality at all?

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woolymonkey
07 June 2008 @ 12:19 pm
Purple rhino questions  
I really don't want to get caught in the controversy about whether  the purple rhino virtual gift is a Good Idea.  (I try to steer clear of the really world-shattering issues.)  But I'm puzzled.

What is this "forgotten" symbol of the Gay Rights Movement? 
Why have I never heard about it until now?  Ignorance?  Britishness?  (Rhinos failed to swim the Atlantic?)
Who thought it would make an inspiring symbol for gay people?
Why?
Why a rhino?
Is this all a wind up?
Why?
Why purple?

Is there any connection to the Purple Cow Poem?

And, finally... why?

Please help if you can!

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woolymonkey
05 June 2008 @ 04:08 pm
Squirrelmonkey is ten today!  

Happy Birthday to Squirrelmonkey!

Anyone can join the celebrations by watching his favourite video and singing along with

Put a banana in your ear!  (Put a ripe banana right inside your favourite ear.)

Warning: if you don't have broadband, this will take forever.
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Current Mood: hyper
 
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woolymonkey
14 May 2008 @ 10:04 am
The (Welsh) Force catches up with Darth Vader...  
.. and the judge sends him off to rehab.

If you missed this story, it's all here, including a video of the scruffy Sith attacking members of the Jedi Church of Wales, who, frankly, need to work on their costumes.

Seems Vader may be heading the same way as Norrington in Dead Man's Chest.

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woolymonkey
09 May 2008 @ 09:51 am
Medieval monkey fighting recs  
From the wonderful Got Medieval, take a look at these pics of valiant and sophisticated monkeys fighting off a besieging army of incompetent foxes.

There's also a link to a monkey poop throwing game but I'm too grown up to try it out.  I have marking to do.

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woolymonkey
02 May 2008 @ 08:59 am
State of the Monkey House  

Nothing exciting really: life has been carrying on pretty smoothly.  But for those who want more detail…

 

 



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woolymonkey
23 April 2008 @ 09:06 am
Hamlet: Scots Ballad Remix (in just 3 minutes)  
The way I heard it,  "Oor Hamlet" was written after a teacher at a songwriting workshop claimed you should be able to tell any story in 3 verses.  Mind you, they are quite long verses.

I have loved it since I first heard Martin Carthy perform it and spent years tracking it down to an obscure recording on cassette that I had to order from Our Price and wait three weeks for.  Now I've just found 5 different versions on Teh Interweb for free!

Adam McNaughton singing "Oor Hamlet"  Completely worksafe if you don't mind funny looks.

The words - which you will need unless you spend a lot of time around Glaswegians.

Enjoy!


 
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woolymonkey
16 April 2008 @ 04:15 pm
Department of Snacks and Security  
Apparently, women are So Stupid we cheerfully give out our security details if offered chocolate.  It must be true: it was in the Guardian.

Personally, I prefer crisps (cheese or BBQ flavour Kettle Chips please), but I'll accept most snacks.  In exchange, feel free to pick a password from the list below:
  • 1234
  • monkey
  • querty
  • whatever_just_hand_over_the_chocolate_you_market_research_cretin

The first three really were the most frequently given answers, which proves either:
  • yep, we really are very dumb
or
  • we're smart enough to con chocolate out of idiots (but not to invent a plausible fake password)
 
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woolymonkey
09 April 2008 @ 09:46 am
Arts emergency - help needed  
Dear wonderful, erudite friendslist, especially Eng. Lit. graduates, artists and musicians,  And [info]artaxastra,

I think I'm going to apply to tutor a course which could be summed up as Everything About All of the Arts Ever.  The job spec requires me to know about: (take a deep breath)  "history, art history, philosophy, classical studies, history of science, religious studies, music and English".  Also, "to teach ... a wide range of arts and humanities subjects, some of which may be outside your own specialism".  Phew!

It's possible that ALL these areas are outside my specialism, but I'm hoping no-one else is going to offer more than patchy knowledge and bluff, just like me.  Feel free to suggest on any of them, but there are three where I could especially use some help:

1. English lit - especially The Great Novels.  I'm OK (for bluffing purposes) on lit theory, analysis, that crap - it's just that most of the "literary" texts I know are in French or German.   Great excuse to catch up on serious reading, but where do I start? (Not Shakespeare or Chaucer - I've actually studied them!)  Also, is there a really basic bluffer's-guide-style overview of English lit that would help me slot what I read into a neat sequence of movements and periods?  To recap: I can do the fancy stuff and the Big Questions (tragedy, irony, deconstruction, that jazz) but I'm embarrassingly lacking in basic knowledge.

2. Art history.  On this one, I confess total ignorance and lack of ability.  Unable to process pictures without lots of words.  Please help!

3. Shostakovich.  His string quartets are a set work.  I think I hate Shostakovich.  He's the reason I keep having to switch off Radio Three.  Please persuade me he's wonderful!

And a bonus question for [info]artaxastra:
What's a good, factual book for learning about Cleopatra - not just her life but how she's been understood and portrayed since she lived?

All suggestions welcome.  I have good library access, so old and obscure books or journals aren't a problem - in fact they're a plus because I can read them for free.

Thanks in advance!



 
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woolymonkey
29 March 2008 @ 12:22 pm
Easter is like Halloween...  
...only with less walking.

Squirrelmonkey wondered if anyone else had noticed this. 

I think he means you don't have to walk so far to find chocolate eggs your granny has hidden in the garden as you do to find houses where your parents will let you knock and demand sweeties.
 
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woolymonkey
05 March 2008 @ 08:48 am
Lukewarm two rat  
Think you know Carmina Burana?  Not sure of your Latin?

See it here with visuals and English subtitles. 

(Make sure you have the sound on.)   Highly educational.  Who knew they had canned tuna in 13th-century Bavaria?  Or push-up bras?

Posted by [info]buboniclou on [info]medievalstudies.  I had to nick it.
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woolymonkey
29 January 2008 @ 03:50 pm
This'll cheer me up - eventually  
"research suggests that 44 is the age at which we are most vulnerable to depression."

I'm 43 until March.  If I can make it through the year after that, things can only get better.  Right?
 
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woolymonkey
08 January 2008 @ 02:44 pm
Happy New Ear  
Spidermonkey and I just came back from another trip to the hospital ear clinic.  It's mostly good news.

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woolymonkey
03 January 2008 @ 10:14 am
New Year book-keeping post  
Last year's one-and-only resolution was to get a clarinet and learn to play it.
Done!
If you define "play" as knowing the scale of G and being able to stumble through "The Medallion Calls" and "Roumanian Horra and Bulgar".

This year I want to:
do pilates  at least 3 times a week;
play clarinet at least twice a week.

Lots of other good intentions, but am limiting myself to two actual resolutions for fear even that is more than I can manage.
 
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woolymonkey
03 January 2008 @ 10:04 am
scientists make orangutans giggle  
Dr Marina Davila Ross, from the University of Portsmouth and Professor Elke Zimmermann at the University of Veterinary Medicine in Hanover, Germany, studied the play behaviour of 25 orang-utans aged between two and 12 at four primate centres around the world.

Dr Davila Ross commented: "What is clear now is the building blocks of positive emotional contagion and empathy that refer to rapid involuntary facial mimicry in humans evolved prior to humankind."

Hard to keep a straight face, isn't it?

News story and giggling orang pic here.

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woolymonkey
23 December 2007 @ 12:32 pm
Merry Christmas  
This year we’re trying out a new way to keep in touch, so this is a long post with a year’s worth of Monkey House news for our non-livejournal-using friends and family.  
If you’ve followed the email link and this is your first visit to livejournal, WELL DONE! You can read most of the journal without logging on or having a livejournal account yourself – you can even leave comments. So please browse around and see what you think. If you like it enough to get an account (which is free and harmless) you can get access to more personal posts and to photos we hope to put up soon.

If you think livejournal is a good way to keep in touch, let us know and we’ll do more of it.

Merry Christmas and a Happy 2008 to everyone!

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